Hovering in the wind, waiting for a reason to either land or take off in full flight.
It is tempting to live a life that is half invested, letting the wind blow us to and fro.
This word loves to try and cause us to love a disengaged life, one that admires love but doesn’t live it out. It is easy to get trapped in a monotonous cycle of letting comparison guide our decisions as we let other people’s voices dictate our worth.
If I am honest lately it has been easy to let my circumstances define my attitude and worth. I’m working as a preschool teacher, and absolutely love it. So much so that I will hopefully be pursuing getting my degree to teach. Yet every now and then I think back on my time spent traveling and doing missions and I can feel myself wanting to uproot and run away. Committing to being here and going to school, although exciting, comes with the realization of growing roots and staying in one place.
Some days I feel discouraged and it is easy to let hopelessness be my perspective. My heart is constantly at war with itself, questioning if it’s worth growing roots and staying. Taking flight is tempting, for maybe it will fulfill this longing inside of me. I want to be honest, I started going to counseling in order to create a space to work through the questions and the chaos within. It was scary at first, I wondered if it would be helpful and wanted to convince myself I didn’t need it. Yet as scary as it is, it has brought freedom through helping me to see the importance of staying rooted.
This week, God so gently reminded me that I must stay engaged in love. I was reading Hannah Brenchers new book “ Come Matter Here” and one of the quotes stuck out to me. (also FYI you can pre-order on amazon or target to get it may 29th , I guarantee that it will change your life).
“It is not about the scenery changing or the person you say goodnight to. The traveler must be the one to change. That is what makes a story good.” – Hannah Brencher, come matter here page 31.
As I take a step back and begin to dwell on that , I find that I start to gain new perspective. Oh how important it is to be fully present, to let change take place within my heart.
Stay engaged in love and don’t be afraid to grow roots. For the purpose within your heart doesn’t have an expiration date.
For even in the desolate seasons where you fear the drought won’t end, God is working and fighting for beauty to bloom. Even in the nights when your questions seem to echo off the walls, God is preparing your heart and sitting near.
Stay engaged in love. Don’t run from the dark nights, instead choose to embrace the light that is within and dig a little deeper.
Stay present and return to simplicity.
For love isn’t complicated. God’s love isn’t fickle or distant, rather it is consistent and persistent.
He fights for our growth and promises restoration and redemption. So don’t be afraid of the unraveling, the seasons spent digging deep wells.
They are so important in your journey, teaching you how to find love in the cracks and the crevices.
Stay engaged in love, find the beauty within and don’t let go. Growth isn’t usually comfortable, for it isn’t instantaneous. It is a process that requires showing up and often times letting go.