Last week was rough. I had been feeling more sick than usual and pretty discouraged with not having answers. I was trying some dietary changes that initially seemed they would help narrow down the answers, or at least leave me … Continue reading
I got flipped off the other day. Which I am sure is something that does not sounds terribly monumental, but it isn’t something that happens to me often. And believe it or not, I have never flipped anybody off. It … Continue reading
Praise often times precedes the miracle. I remember repeating these words to myself a few weeks ago when I was sitting at a point of desperation and frustration. I wanted to believe that God would provide money for my colonoscopy- … Continue reading
I remember you. Curly hair, sun-kissed skin that emphasized your freckles. A smile that still managed to convey a small piece of hope. Your eyes reflected the hurt and abuse that had stolen your innocence. You spent your life tiptoeing … Continue reading
Growth. The process of letting love grow roots as we learn who we are and what we are capable of. Brokenness. The pieces of your past life that try to define your future purpose and to hinder your growth. Redemption. … Continue reading
There is an oppression that comes from our silence. Our voices are meant to be raised, to be a beacon of light and love. Yet so often we are the ones who turn our heads the other way, choosing to … Continue reading
Chaos. The stirring up of the lies that have for so long spun their webs around our hearts. Thirsty. Our hearts cry out for freedom from the fears that stifle their potential and purpose. Freedom. The love that has the … Continue reading
I so often find that I am afraid of life being messy. I love the pouring rain, the way it so effortlessly falls to the ground yet I hide from the thunder and the way it gently washes away the beautiful path that I have spent so long planning out.
My feet crave familiar ground, my heart thrives off of the ideas this world feeds us about what life should look like. I find myself content to settle letting my heartbeat slow down to match the cries of those around me, the ones who for so long have stolen my voice. Yet I am filled with this deep restlessness, my heart refusing to stay still because deep down I know that life is so much more then going through the motions.
Some days my heart is full of laughter and joy the words fill this blank canvas so effortlessly, yet other days it tightens from the brokenness that surrounds me trying to silence the flowers that have begun to grow in my heart.
How often do I run from this brokenness, the unanswered questions and the way life isn’t turning out how I expected. It is so easy to choose to slowly allow ourselves to become lost in society’s standards and ways of living. So often we run from the process of restoration because we have been told it isn’t possible and that to go deep is unnecessary because healing isn’t instantaneous. Everyone likes to talk about true love and fairy tale endings all the while carefully avoiding the process and the messiness that makes them all the more beautiful.
Yet when did the messiness in authenticity become something to avoid and why is it that we let the process of growth stop us from pursuing our dreams? Isn’t life so much more then finding momentary happiness and letting the pursuit of worldly things stop us from being real and vulnerable. You see, the true beauty to be found in life is in the imperfections and the way that our hearts were never meant to be hidden behind labels and contained by four walls. It is time to stand up and to be honest, to let people in and to go deep in love. In all honesty, yes people will hurt you and sometimes your life will go in a direction you weren’t planning, but once you embrace this and choose to still walk forward you will realize how little success and fame matter and that you were made to grow deep roots and to love boldly.
In the end we only really have each other and so in this beautiful journey it is time to let go of control and perfection and to step into the unknown messiness that is found in being human. We were made to breathe, to truly live and to dance in the rain without a care in the world. Life is messy and love isn’t meant to just fulfill you, it is meant to give you the courage to be real.
